Losing is Winning in Las Vegas

For anyone who’s ever felt the inimitable rush of riding the Vegas wave, life is grand. There’s no place like Sin City to awaken your senses, feed your greed and fuel your fires. The famed Las Vegas Blvd is all the rage. It’s the place where dreams are a click away and dazzling entertainment is an everyday reality. From the fountains of the Bellagio to the skyline of New York, New York, Las Vegas never sleeps. As your resident blackjack dealer, I’m particularly enamored by all the thrilling stories I’ve heard and the interesting characters I’ve had the pleasure of meeting.

The joke of the month is about to hit your screen – are you ready for it?

With the festive season approaching, I’m particularly keen to listen to players’ stories about Sin City. So here’s one that had me in stitches. True, we’ve probably heard variations of this joke, but it’s apt for Las Vegas so I wanted to share it with you folks. There’s a dude named Steve. He’s been playing poker for close on 20 years. His poker smarts have allowed him to raise three kids and live a pretty spectacular lifestyle. After a long chat, he and his wife Kirsty decide that he should undergo a vasectomy.

He checks into the Men’s Care Clinic in Santa Barbara and readies himself for the prep work on his member. A buxom nurse – gorilla looking – walks into the room to shave his private parts. It’s then that she notices R U SH tattooed on his ding-a-ling. Excited about the tattoo she thunders into the nurses station to tell her co-worker Natalie. Natalie on the other hand is a bombshell with an hourglass figure and gorgeous blonde locks. She saunters into the ward and looks for Steve.

Upon noticing him, the blonde nurse picks up his chart and lifts the sheet to take a peek at the tattoo. Confused, she runs back into the nurses’ station and finds the ape-like matron. ‘I found Steve, but I never saw the word RUSH tattooed onto his thingy. I saw the words ROYAL FLUSH. How many poker players are there with tattoos on their members in this clinic anyway?”

Signing off for the week

An angry wife says to her neighbor: “My miscreant of a husband wanted me to sleep with the landlord because he lost all his money playing blackjack and now we don’t have money to pay the rent.’ The astounded neighbor raises her eyes in bewilderment, ‘Really? Did you do it?’ The wife drops her gaze, ‘Yes I did, with certain misgivings of course. What I haven’t done though is tell my husband that the rent is now paid up 6 months in advance!’