Neigh-Sayers in Las Vegas

I’ve got to say that the Sport of Kings is high on my list of favourite punting options. In spite of the fact that 21 is my game of choice and the one I’m best qualified to deal, I quite enjoy the sound of those hooves thundering across the track. This brings me to the subject of today’s article. Two nights ago I was finishing up my shift when several well-dressed fellas came to my table. It was the late shift and I recall these dapper gentlemen – whiskies in hand - strutting up to my table with one thing in mind: high-rolling.

Blackjack is certainly a game where you can make a pretty penny and if the luck of the draw is with you, then it’s entirely possible to walk away with plenty of swagger. I’ve dealt an Ace out of the shoe and the gentleman in front of me and directly to my right is sitting on 14. He’s got a lot of money riding on this game. I know he wants to hit because he’s worried that I’ve got Blackjack. So he hits and draws an 8 – going bust in the process. Instead of skulking away, he looks at his pals and starts off about his string of racehorses. The jokes to follow had me grinning with glee. What a night I was about to have…

The Sin City nunnery and the beggar who bet right                                      

So the local Sisters of Mary Church hears the tragic news that Father John has passed on. Fortunately he left a great deal of his wealth to the community and indeed a little something to several nuns under his care. Sister Anne, Sister Susan and Sister Josephine were each left several hundred dollars – much to their delight. Sister Anne wanted to do some good with her legacy and decided to donate it to the community center in the neighborhood. Sister Susan was enamored by Sister Anne’s benevolence and she too decided to do some good for her community. She went to the supermarket and bought food for the kids at the orphanage up the street.

And when it came time for Sister Josephine to make a decision, she too wanted to help. But her goal was to help just one person. As she stared out of the church windows, she saw a homeless man rifling through the garbage in search of food. She called out to him, ‘Brother, come here.’ The man limped towards her. She stuffed a handful of dollars – hundreds of them – into his hands and said, ‘For you brother - Godspeed. Be on your way.’ The man beamed from ear to ear.

Three days later the homeless man comes running up the stairs to the church. But this time he is clad in a Gucci suit, Italian shoes and driving a BMW M5. ‘I’m looking for the kind sister whom I spoke with the other day,’ he calls out. Sister Anne recognizes the man’s face. ‘I’m sorry sir. She’s out for the day.’ The man looks heavenward, then refocuses his gaze on the nun, ‘Could you tell her please that her advice has paid off. I’ve hit jackpot gold at the racetrack. Godspeed – the outsider by a long shot – came in and I’ve minted it!’

Join us next week here on 777 for more super jokes and fun-filled gaming stories. Remember you heard it first from your resident Vegas blackjack dealer.