Over the years a seasoned blackjack dealer in an upmarket Las Vegas establishment gets to learn from the best of the best and the worst of the worst. We see them all: the high-rollers punting from 1st base or the low-rollers sitting at 3rd. But it’s their stories that bring life to the game. This week’s sampling is served up piping hot!
Vegas never sleeps. That statement requires no further qualification. Suffice it to say that a dealer’s job in Vegas is filled with fascinating tales and laughs galore, fun and more. I’ve heard so many sidesplitting stories and seen the most bizarre occurrences. Some of these stories border on the obtuse. One such story involves a group of players who came to my blackjack table. This was several years ago now, but I’ll never forget it. A boorish man and his doting wife were sitting to my right and a gentleman with all the charm of a snake-oil salesman was to my left. I noticed right off the bat that he was eyeing out the boorish man’s wife. But as per usual, dealer interaction is kept to a minimum and the game got underway.
What’s that you say miss?
The lady (and she was quite a looker) asked the obviously attentive man to her right about whether or not she should hit. She was holding a 7-4 count and I was on 6. The nattily clad man next to her was quite taken with her interest in making conversation and he responded in kind. ‘Well miss, that’s looking good – I’d hit that!’ The lady’s husband turns around to face what he considers an affront to his pride. ‘I beg your pardon!’ he retorts. The well-dressed fella was in shock because he thought he was offering sensible advice. ‘Never hit if there’s a chance you can go bust!’ the unkempt husband replied as he went back to his Jack Daniels and Coca Cola. As if she was going to go bust on an 11 count…
Stories like that are all too common in Las Vegas and over the years dealers get pretty used to hearing them. Other less funny instances of blackjack faux pars and eccentricities regularly make their rounds. Here’s one straight off the humor shelf – enjoy. A casino mogul who owns a game ranch is celebrating its 10th birthday. The celebrations were held over a crocodile enclosure in Madagascar. The mogul is sloshed out of his mind and decides on some fun and games. ‘If any man can swim across this crocodile enclosure, I”ll not only marry him off to my beautiful daughter, but I’ll provide him with $5 million in cash.’
Within seconds there’s a splash and the sounds of frantic swimming as a man scrambles to make it to the other side of the enclosure. Soaking wet, he hightails it outta the crocodile pen and falls to his hands and knees on the ground alongside the mogul. ‘That was splendid!’ booms the casino mogul. ‘Here, take my daughter and this briefcase full of cash’ The man who is an astute blackjack player in a top-tier contest looks up at the host and says, ‘Keep your darn money! I just want to find the sonofagun who pushed me in!’
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