Wedding Bells in Vegas

Las Vegas has as many churches as it does casinos. Not surprising since there are so many nuptials taking place there all the time. And with so many couples coming to get hitched it makes sense that the wedding chapels make provision for payments in various forms. Casino chips are commonly used to pay for wedding services. This being the case, the churches often have a carefully devised system in place for these basket collections. Typically the monastery will be entrusted with the task of taking the chips to the respective casinos to be cashed in. These collection agents are known as chip monks.

Let’s ramp things up a little as we take a different perspective on Sin City

One fine evening I’m dealing cards from the shoe at my blackjack table. It’s a cold night outside. As a matter of fact, it’s pretty much this time of year – just before the Christmas and New Year celebrations.  Any of you who have been to Vegas in mid-December will know that it’s pretty chilly and the wind is blowing something wicked outside. I decide to walk south down Las Vegas Blvd towards I-Hop. I fancy getting something to warm me up from the blistering cold outside. The walk is hardly worth it, but as a born and bred Nevadan I know how to insulate. So I’m sitting in the diner and these out-of-towners are yapping away about something. With my curiosity piqued, I lean in to get a better listen (it really wasn’t necessary since they were hardly whisperingJ). On a 5-scale PG rating, this one’s a 3.

‘Two farmers from Kentucky decide to take a cross-country trip to Las Vegas. On the way they pass a gas station with a sign that reads: guess the right number between 1 and 10 after buying a tank of gas and win free sex on your way to Las Vegas. The farmers are duly impressed. “Let’s try it out” says Hank to Pappy. Both men are keen to get some action sooner rather than later and they’re almost out of gas anyway. “Might as well,” says Pappy. They tear into the gas station and come to a grinding halt outside the KwikMart, fill up and pay the bill. “So how does this contest work?” asks Hank. The attendant eyes the two farmers carefully and replies, “Okay you’ve bought a tank of gas. Now you guess a number between 1 and 10. If it’s my number then you get free sex.” Pappy wolf whistles as he can’t believe how easy this is going to be.

“I’ve got a 10% chance of guessing correctly; I’m going to go with number 7,” he says. The gas station attendant expresses his supposed dejection, “Sorry guy, I was thinking of number 3 – better luck next time.” The two farmers drive on into Las Vegas and have a blast. On their way back they see the same gas station with the same offer. “Let’s try it one more time!” says Hank. Pappy is keen to get his money’s worth this time. “Okay guy, I’m guessing number 9 this time,” says Pappy. “Wrong. I was thinking of number 2,”says the attendant. As they’re heading back to the car, Hank says to Pappy, “I’m starting to think this is all a big con!’ Pappy is less convinced, “That’s not true. My wife Mindy won twice last week!”